wanna be sedated
Monday, July 28, 2008OUTSIDE THE STREETS
The rainy skies of June washed out July’s hot scorching sun straight into my senses. If the 3rd week of July isn’t the hottest week of the year, I must’ve died and partied in hell. I’ve been waiting for a cab for 30 f*cking minutes when I began to hallucinate.Am I in a dessert or am I in hell? The world is do damn hot and my head hurt. My eyes ache. My feet hurt. (tang’na arte! LOL) I’m like a raw jelly fish on the foot of a space rocket ready to blow myself into ‘jelly’ pieces…F*CK GLOBAL WARMING!…back to my hallucinations. I can see Wentworth Miller coming, like an egyptian warrior in his black turban ridin’ a beautiful black horse ready to sweep me of my feet. Tanga ka dba!?…sa lahat ba naman ng pwedeng pag-pantashyahan…si wentworth pa eh bading yun!!! Fine. Heath, Mr. Hot! Hot! Heath Ledger…in his sexy cowboy stance. (Sh!t..bakla parin!) Sexy gay cowboys really did exist in this fag-filled world. TSK TSK! A’right…last option. ALEXANDER the Great!! One of the greatest military strategists and tacticians who ever lived. A commander who never lost a battle.(ok you guys know that already!) Awesome! (great! …he’s gay.)
WTF..as I stood there irradiated, I wanna call Katrina and ask her to come and pick me up…I wanna be sedated. LOLOLOLOL! I finally hailed a friggin taxi…
dare desu ka?
Tuesday, July 15, 2008There are 3 of me:
There’s the FISH.
Who’s lovin’ a solitary and mercurial life in her dreary aquarium. Her prime need is food to live. And that food is Life. But then, she realized, a fish can’t survive with food alone…what good is food if she don’t have oxygen? So, oxygen is her basic need. And that oxygen is called Freedom. But then again, what significance does oxygen have if she can’t even keep it…thus, she needs Water. That water is love. (iwannapuke!) LOL
Then there’s the CAB DRIVER.
Who picks up passenger from different streets. Passengers of different character, breeding, concept of love & hate, and sex. I am that driver, my life is in constant motion. Meeting people whom I trusted, hated, respected, desired, hurt and love. Most of them did the same thing for me, but not all of what I’ve mentioned was credited on my behalf. (not that I care…to hell with them! LOL) I have to pull over for these mortals to get off my cab. They paid me a handful of love and hate though, and thats friggin’ too much to handle. I have to let them go because I can’t make them stay with me forever. Then I have to move on to that road called life, thinking how good-slash-”fucked up” life is if I have them with me forever. But everytime I turn to the other side of the road, I realized that ownership of a soul is surreal just like happiness…
and if it can’t be mine, then there’s no point of keeping it.
I learned that if someone is not meant for you, thats because you don’t need him/her,or he doesn’t need you actually, another soul exist that needs you or him the most.(oh well! enough said…)
and…there’s the DAUGHTER & MOTHER.
I am a daughter and a mother rolled into one. A daughter who needs recognition from a mother and mother who’s subtlety could kill her daughter.
I’m a daughter and a mother living under one roof, who’s feasting a cold war with each other.
When both entities collide, its either they will kill each other or breathe life for both.
One dominates the other, and the other finds pleasure in that domination. If the collision is not fashioned in complete reverence…one bleeds in its own beauty, and the other one survives in defeat.
a fish,
a cab driver,
a daughter&mother.
which one have you met?
which one deserves you?
which one do you want?
which one do you love and loves you?
***
…..
DARE DESU KA?
who are you?
